You know you are getting old when you start thinking about what you would do differently if you were 20 years younger.
I have been rather lucky to be have remained 35 (or is it 37, I get confused sometimes) for several years now, but this great party I attended last night got me to thinking … what I would do differently if I were 20 years younger? More on the party later.
What does the story on his torso say?
The reason this is coming up at all is that I recently had a heated discussion about how little fun young people these days seem to be having. They are wearing too many boxer shorts (around their knees), spending too much time writing on themselves which might explain why they can’t seem to write proper sentences in their books.
Inevitably, the conversation, straight out of Absolutely Fabulous, went something like this … “In our day, we made sure we looked gorgeous, gave it up freely to anyone and everyone, kept our mouths shut, giving the entire thing an air of dignity…”
Sometimes I get to feelin’
I was back in the old days – long ago
When we were kids when we were young
Thing seemed so perfect – you know
The days were endless we were crazy we were young
The sun was always shinin’ – we just lived for fun (Queen)
You could see the poor put-upon young boys struggle not to roll their eyes, no doubt in part because they’ve heard the stories a hundred and N times but also because they were miffed that being reminded that they are not getting laid isn’t going to put a lid on their raging hormones.
So, knowing what I know, what do I see about some of the generation Y trends that I would adopt?
If you can carry them off, why not?
The tattoo fad hasn’t quite caught up in Africa the way it has in America for instance in part because of the conservative nature of societies on the dark continent. It must also be because the high yellow complexions that lend themselves to serious tattooing aren’t that prevalent in black Africa. You have to wonder what the kids with the excessive tattoos will do when the fad dies out or, dare one say it, when they have to go and find a job.
Gosh are those enough undergarments?
As most 40-somethings don’t know, skinny jeans for men are in. Not only that, skinny jeans in rainbow colors are in: red, orange, yellow, green, indigo, blue, violet jeans are available to order.
In order to fit into them, it stands to reason that you have to be skinny but that need not necessarily be the case for everyone. Women, as we all know, squeeze themselves into the tightest skinny jeans that leave nothing to the imagination and so, in the name of gender balance, I think it is right that men, too, should partake in the joys of putting it all out there without actually taking their clothes off. Yours truly has a pair of skinny jeans somewhere and he is going to try them on after posting this.
What I still don’t understand about our 20 somethings is why they feel a need to wear three or four layers of underclothing. Is it about keeping the heat in or am I missing something? What if they have to put the undergarments back on (we all know young men that age don’t have homes of their own so they sneak around other people’s homes when the owners are at work) in a hurry?
Saggin: when the pants are too heavy to stay on your butt, let them go
Oh, did I promise to get back to the great party last night? It was simply awesome with all the classy boys of Kampala in attendance. The reason I even mentioned it is that as I sat down this morning to ruminate about what I would do if I turned back the hands of time, it occurred to me that none of the
Rainbow colored skinny jeans are in
young men there (and there were young men in spades) was tattooed, wore sagging pants or, sadly, seemed to be wearing rainbow-colored skinny jeans. Either Ugandan gay boys have developed a thick skin against popular fads from yonder lands or they know themselves far better than we give them credit for.
Now, where did I put my afro wig? I hear afros and bell bottoms are back in fashion.
If I could turn back the hands of time, I would again be a gorgeous little tramp in skinny rainbow jeans tightly hugging my cute little butt, without underwear, and I would sleep around with whoever, wherever … keep my mouth shut, thereby giving the whole thing an air of dignity.